On Friday, devastating news emerged from Texas: more than 100 people, many of them children, lost their lives in a flash flood of the Guadalupe River near Camp Mystic. What was meant to be a summer of joy and connection ended in unimaginable heartbreak.
As adults, we struggle to make sense of tragedies like this. But when children are impacted, whether directly or indirectly, the layers of grief become even more complex.
Sometimes, well-intentioned adults believe that young children are too little to understand death, or that if we avoid the subject, it will spare them pain. But grief isn’t something that disappears just because we don’t talk about it. In fact, silence can deepen a child’s confusion or fear.
Even very young children notice when something is wrong. They feel the changes in tone, rhythm, and energy around them. They may not fully understand the permanence of death, but they absolutely sense loss.
As someone who holds a pediatric end-of-life doula certification and is a proud member of the National Alliance for Children’s Grief (NACG), I’ve seen firsthand how essential it is to include children in the grieving process, at their level, in their language, and on their timeline.
How to Talk to Children About Tragedy in the News
When something as heartbreaking as the Camp Mystic flood makes national headlines, many children will hear about it, at school, through overheard conversations, or even from social media. The NACG offers five beautiful, compassionate reminders when talking to kids about difficult news:
- Start by asking what they already know.
This gives you insight into their understanding and any misconceptions they may already have. - Listen with patience.
Hold space for their feelings without rushing to fix or correct them. - Offer honest, simple, age-appropriate explanations.
Avoid euphemisms like “went to sleep” or “lost,” which can be confusing or scary to young children. - Consider limiting their exposure to the news.
Repeated images or discussions can create anxiety or trauma that lingers. - Most importantly, remind them they are safe and loved.
Children need emotional anchoring more than they need perfect answers.
How to Support a Grieving Child After a Death
In the wake of a personal loss, not just a national tragedy, children need ongoing care, clarity, and comfort. Here are a few key do’s and don’ts when talking to a child about death:
- Do answer their questions honestly, even if the answers are hard.
- Do model healthy grief, including tears and remembrance.
- Do offer repeated opportunities to talk, not just once.
- Don’t assume they’re fine just because they’re quiet or playing.
- Don’t hide your grief entirely. They’re learning from you how to mourn.
- Don’t forget that grief is not linear, and milestones can trigger fresh waves of sadness.
Children grieve in cycles. They may revisit the loss as they grow, ask new questions at different developmental stages, and process the death again and again. Our job is not to shield them from grief, but to walk beside them through it.
If You Know a Family Navigating Grief
If someone in your life is supporting a grieving child or grieving themselves while also parenting, please remind them they don’t have to do it alone. I’m here to help.
As a death doula with specialized training in pediatric grief, I offer gentle, age-appropriate guidance for families facing the unimaginable. Whether it’s helping a child understand the death of a sibling, grandparent, or friend or navigating the impact of a tragedy like the Camp Mystic flood, support is available.
📩 You can reach out to me at kathy@marigoldpath.com to learn more or schedule a private consultation at https://calendly.com/kathy-marigoldpath/explore-grief-support.
💛 Grief is hard, especially for children. But with the right support, healing is possible.
